JelleS’ photostream, Flickr

I have decided that the YouTube video ‘milking Newcastle’ is hilarious. Yes, it is ridiculous, yes, it is immature, but so what? In a world filled with war, rape and murder, surely a bit of light hearted silliness wouldn’t go amiss? Apparently not.

Having read the Daily Mail readers’ comments (I know, I know), my personal favourite was written by a caring individual, concerned about the welfare of calves, and the emotional disturbance they suffer when separated from their mothers… Sorry did I say caring? I meant ludicrous. So now pouring a couple of pints of milk over your head is cruelty to animals? Ooh, someone call the RSPCA. No. This isn’t Animal Hospital. Rolf isn’t going to shed a tear over the plight of a baby cow. We eat them. Deal with it.

‘It’s a waste of milk,’ I hear some of you cry (in my head obviously). ‘What about the starving and the thirsty?’ Jeez Louise. They didn’t ransack an entire dairy farm, milk the cows dry and bathe in it, laughing while the residents of Jesmond, and the world, die of thirst. A few bored boys bought a few bottles of milk and did something silly, and, come on, admit, it, entertaining. How could you not laugh at the absolute ridiculousness of a boy, halfway up a tree, dousing himself in milk? Much safer and less dramatic than petrol. Also, I’m sure I noticed a couple of them drinking some of it anyway, albeit as it was running down their faces. It would be rude, and probably impossible, not to.

They weren’t hurting anyone, mocking anyone, or degrading anyone (apart from the calves, how could I forget the calves?) I really don’t understand how so many people can be taking such an issue with it. Lighten up, people! Seriously. Everyone’s sense of humour is different, you can’t put regulations on what people can and can’t laugh at, it’s really not that prescriptive. Obviously, if you don’t find it funny, you don’t find it funny, but move on. Why bother taking the time to write a personal comment insulting these boy’s mums or their intelligence? What has it achieved, other than making you sound like the Grinch. The worst kind of Grinch. A milk Grinch.

I’m well aware that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and there’s that whole freedom of speech thing and blah blah blah, but if you’re going to be unpleasant, I suggest instead you exercise your right to freedom of thought instead. Just saying.